Why Are We so Loved by the Lovers that We Cannot Have?

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The Fairy Tale:

Once upon a time you fell in love. You got married. You stayed together forever. And you lived happily ever after.

The Truth:

wedding-322034_640Most of the time our true loves, our soul mates, our twin flames, come into our lives at the wrong times. For some the sacrifices that are needed to stay together can be done. For most the sacrifices that are literally “human sacrifices” are too costly and can leave a family, an empire and a legacy destroyed by the collateral damages demanded by love until the only choices are to let go, give up or carry on in secret.

Marriages often fall apart because partners “settle for” someone that they feel that they can have a life with, raise children with and settle down with … but often these “someones” are safe choices in a world where high risk and high stakes are part of truly living an authentic romantic life. Or, these relationships carry on via a romance “auto pilot” until one or both partners meets their soul mate or twin flame and then decisions have to be made … or not.

The Catalyst:

I was on the phone today with a girlfriend sharing this experience, which is an honest experience, because we are both women who are not afraid of our sexual appetites, nor are we afraid of what our hearts want, but cannot have. This is the reality of the sex life of the single woman these days. And since most of our choices include a population of men who have been hopelessly damaged by the unreasonable expectations created by the porn industry … well … girls like us have to become secret sexual “mavericks” lest our friends and neighbors diminish our education, intellect and talent with a single world – SLUT.

The Twist:

 

In this world of newly minted sexual standards exacerbated by readily available pornography and cheap “camera girls” who will do anything for a buck we are both grateful for the men that we can “have” and especially for the men that we can’t, because of circumstances, because invariably these men that are so vigorously unattainable, love us better than the ones that we can have without too much of a fuss. They put us on pedestals, make us Muses and overall appreciate every breath that we take, while our stable, comfortable relationships lead to us being taken for granted. Oh the paradox.

The Compromise:

Throughout my life I have struggled to be happy with the men that I have “settled for” and those relationships have worked, but they always ended.

The Irony:

I firmly believe that my relationship with “the one that I cannot have” will be my longest relationship founded on unconditional love in this lifetime.

My Take:

Sometimes knowing who your twin flame is without any doubt is a pain in the ass.

background-313544_640My Solution:

I do not hesitate to love with an open heart. And I keep my mouth shut about everything else.

My Current State of Affairs:

My man knows he’s not my twin flame and when he takes me for granted … I remind him of it… and that little tinge of jealousy makes our sex that much spicier. Sure it’s something I can live with. But, I’m a resilient realist. LOL #realness

 

 Please watch this testimonial:

 

 

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