Empath’s Guide to Sanity 2017


From the Merriam Webster Dictionary:


2:     the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner; also :  the capacity for this

The Basics

  • Every living thing is empathic to some extent because empathy is one of the oldest forms of non-verbal communication. Scientists speculate that humans or “Homo Erectus” started talking about 100,000 years ago, but they can’t decide if language began as soon as the human brain became big enough, or if it developed slowly over time.
  • If you have a pet chances are that you have developed better empathic skills than the typical non-pet owner because animals are better empaths than humans and pets have a tendency to “teach” their owners a thing or two.
  • You are most empathic when you are a baby before you say your first words. The ability then fades because language is used as a replacement but it does not go away and it can be enhanced through meditation.
  • People who have a connection to plants and nature also tend to be more empathic.  While some literally “talk” to their plants to help them grow, others naturally give their plants energy and attention and the difference in plant growth is tangible.
  • Psychics and mediums can be painfully empathic as a side effect of their ability to communicate with disembodied spirits, elementals, angels, demons, fairies, etc …

The Challenges

While the ability to communicate non-verbally with everything can be a gift, the inability to “turn it off” at will can be maddening and at the very least uncomfortable. In my case I was already super tense after the volleys between Trump and Kim Jong Un that I had a persistent ache in the pit of my stomach. But after the riots in Charlottesville I literally felt like I was about to throw up for days. I felt the hodge podge of fear, despair and rage in waves and I had to force myself to not look at the news. Meanwhile, places that had large concentrations of people like the grocery store, Walmart, or the mall were stricly off limits until things settled down on the surface.

Feeling Overwhelmed:  Feelings of being overcome or overwhelmed literally came out of the blue. News sites showed me what I was reacting to and that helped me sort out my true feelings from what emotions I was being bombarded with.

Upset Stomach:  The stomach is where most people carry their emotions. It is no coincidence that we call our most important feelings as “a gut feeling.” My gut was suffering under the weight of the public emotional outpouring of reactions to a possible nuclear war and the threat of rampant racism.

Nausea: As tensions mounted I literally felt like I was having chronic morning sickness. It took a day for me to get over feeling like I wanted to vomit every hour.

Anxiety and Depression: As a result of a combination of all the symptoms mentioned above, I began to get anxious and depressed.

Chronic Fatigue: My body reacted by slowing down and the best medicine for me was to nap for hours in order to “make it go away” because in sleep and through dreams I was able to release a lot of psychic tension.

Sharing What I’ve Learned

Just as the madness was breaking out on the newsfeeds I saw a lot of ads for classes and I was astonished at the amount of woo and silliness people were trying to push on suffering empaths around the globe. So, I decided that I would freely share what I do from day to day to cope with the chaos.

Coping Measures

  • Feeling Overwhelmed/Grounding: I am fortunate to live in a pretty little witchy house at the foot of the mountains. Every morning before I water my little potted patio garden filled with herbs and roses I take off my shoes. I spend a lot of my time barefoot in the garden which allows my tension to be released through the bottoms of my feet. I refocus my attention on my plants and ask them to take away my tension. During the worst times I put my hands on my little ficus tree and imagine my energy going down through the trunk of to tree into the Earth.


  • Upset Stomach & Nausea/Ginger Everything:  While I wish I had enough time to peel, crush and grind fresh ginger root into a tea every day, I’m far too busy for that. Making fresh ginger tea is a luxury, so I stock up on ginger ale, ginger chews (candy) and ginger snaps (my favorite cookie) so I have something quick and easy to help me calm my stomach and alleviate my nausea.


  • My friends and favorite tv shows as well as meditation/Anxiety and Depression:  I meditate and do mantra at least 20 minutes every day. Sometimes I may get lost in it for up to an hour because being in alpha state feels great. However, there is nothing like a convo with a good friend or an episode of “Game of Thrones” to pull me out of a funk. John Oliver has been good for my soul. And frankly, I miss Jon Stewart. Jon Stewart was my comedy shaman who cured all ills.


  • Naps and Early Bed Times/Chronic Fatigue: When all else failed I am sooooo grateful to be working primarily from home. I have the luxury of taking a nap whenever I feel the need. When I am working outside of my domestic sanctuary of peace and chocolate I come home with take out, or nuke an organic microwave dinner and drop off to sleep no matter who early it is.


Emergency Empath Hacks

  • Wearing Amber and Black Tourmaline jewelry to seal up my aura.
  • Taking cleansing baths in epsom salts and baking soda.
  • Playing my favorite music to raise the vibe and drown out everything else. (Amy Winehouse has saved my life.)

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Sansa Stark: My Favorite Anti-Heroine Returns to GOT with a Vengeance

Sansa-StarkSince last season’s post, “Pop Tarot: Sansa Stark is the Queen of Swords,” I have awaited the return of Sophie Turner in this iconic role with bated breath. Sansa’s evolution from pampered princess to the Queen of the North has been fraught with the trials and tribulations that I can relate to all too well.

In the days following the broadcast I have come to identify with Sansa more and more because frankly we’ve been down the same road.  I too have been orphaned, abused and twisted the subtle ways that life and pain can twist you in order to give you the sinister coping skills to survive. Nevertheless,  I assure you my enemies often refer to me as a gorgeous monster.

x-men-apocalypse-poster-jean-grey-sophie-turner-375x600While my besties revel in the triumph of Gal Gadot’s WONDER WOMAN, I find the Amazonian Princess a bit to “white lightey” for my taste and hunger for the dark queen witch bitch that I hope to see Sansa ascend to … perhaps even the iron throne. Dani has the unfair advantage of having dragons after all. Meanwhile, Sophie Turner has already done an impressive turn as the fiery X-Man Jean Grey/the Phoenix.  Gadot has alot to learn about navigating through Hollywood and I hope she does well. Turner has already done it. I like Sophie.

As we count down to Season 7 of GOT I see the number 7 in magickal terms.

7 is a ‘magical’ vibration and is the number of the occultist and the esoteric. 7’s are secretive, mysterious, stand-offish, intuitive and introspective. An unworldly attitude means most 7’s need to be ‘protected’. The 7 vibration represents rest, contemplation, spirituality, sensitivity, sympathy and mastery. 7 is a number of the ‘mind’. 

As a magickal practicioner my fave outcome would be for Sansa to become a witch to challenge the Red Priestess in a to the death magickal war… Red Head vs. Red Witch in a knock down drag out magickael maelstrom. (sigh)


Pop Tarot – Sansa Stark is a Queen of Swords

Sophie Turner – Sansa – Game of Thrones Season 6

For many viewers of HBO’s medieval powerhouse Game of Thrones  Sansa Stark has been a victim for many seasons.  When we first saw her lose her beloved dire wolf,  Lady, after Arya’s rebellion against Joffrey in season 1; I knew intuitively that they were going to tear this girl apart limb from limb and I dreaded seeing yet another human sacrifice. As one who despised Vanessa’s sacrifice in order to “go to God” in the finale of Showtime’s Penny Dreadful; I watched the latest Game of Thrones episode where thankfully Sansa came into her own,  with a mixture of dread and triumph although they may kill Sansa  yet. She has grown very nicely into the Red Wolf. In the days following the broadcast I have come to identify with Sansa more and more because frankly we’ve been down the same road.  I too have been orphaned, abused and twisted the subtle ways that life and pain can twist you in order to give you the sinister coping skills to survive. Nevertheless,  I assure you my enemies often refer to me as a gorgeous monster.

For many in the blogosphere Sansa embodied the classic Princess Archetype at the beginning of the show. But season after season, through Joffrey, Little Finger, Tyrion and finally Ramsay; we’ve seen her be  humiliated, lied to, used and abused to the extent that no Princess should ever have to suffer.  And yet through it all she has survived and become for me what I interpret intuitively as the archetype for the tarot card the Queen of Swords.

In most interpretations of the court card the Queen of Swords represents the mature intellect devoid of emotion.  Surely, Sansa embodies this now. She is not above fooling her half-brother Jon Snow for his own good.  And we can almost stand sinfully in her skin as she releases the hounds to eat her loathsome ex, Ramsey Bolton. Both moves were brilliant and perfectly timed. Years of abuse have taught her how to separate thought, feeling and emotion in order for her to survive to womanhood.  And she has become a bit of a monster in her own right albeit a beautiful one at that.  One has to wonder what Cersei suffered as a girl to become as twisted as she is today. And we know that Dani, the other queenly survivor, was literally a slave until she was married and then painfully widowed.  And yet all three woman have power in this violently misogynistic world, but only because they were born into nobility. A common peasant girl would never have survived such treatment and many of the whores in this world die young. We’ve seen them drop like flies.

The Queen of Swords  in many readings refers to a woman who has survived such trials32f2c16ac287ddda9ef59d4e0d1ea352 and tribulations and come out not only whole, but a heroine in the most difficult situations. Traditionally the Queen of Swords is a widow, but in most cases she is a woman who survived the loss of her family, a loved one or perhaps even her soul mate. Australian born singer Sia comes to mind. It is hard to imagine that the resplendent angel of oddity singing underneath the stars at Coachella this year had ever lost the love of her life. But there she was serenading a packed audience underneath the desert sky literally transforming them with sound. In some cases the Queen of Swords is a veteran of drug addiction who constantly battles her inner demons with such intent that her own knowledge of self is as sharp as a sword tip. There are those women who have risen to the heights of their careers at a young age because they are driven to succeed in order to escape the horrors of the powerlessness of incest and sexual molestation.  And those women,  who for whatever reason have survived enough failed relationships to reach the other side of menopause with more than enough gumption to abandon the notions of being wives have become advocates, PHDs, best-selling authors and crazy cat ladies with the secrets of magick hidden in the creases of their smiles.

These are the Queens of Swords that I know and love oh so well.  Behind the closed door of my reading room we glimpse into the vaults of the Akashic records or spy on converging time lines intent on figuring out ways to conquer in business and in the bedroom.  So, I assure you that there are times when we take delight in sharpening our swords against a cruel world because we’ve grown accustomed to winning against the odds. Say what you will about this particular Queen. Victory is hers.

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